LaLa's Blog

My thoughts put into words

I Just Want Him July 31, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — larenar13 @ 8:28 pm

I can’t stop crying.  I’m tired of waiting.  I love Matthew more than anything in this world and I would give up anything just to be with him.  He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.  Why couldn’t  see that??  I was naive I was stupid I was convinced that there had to be something wrong with our relationship.  I kept thinking that until I started CREATING problems and making things wrong with it.  Why??? Why was I so stupid?  Why did I throw away my future?  I hate what I did!  It kills me that I’ll never feel that kind of love again and I’ll never know what it feels like on my wedding day or the day I have my first child.  I look at my sister and I wish I could have the things she has…a loving husband and a precious child on the way.  But I can’t have those things…at least not with someone that I’m in love with.  I don’t want it with anyone else and I threw away that chance.  Im miserable.  I just want another chance

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